Money Woes

i'm offically broke. i dont think i have enough money to survive. damn....

whatever...

saturday... was the day i spent $728 dollars on a bike....
well... i dont really regret it. because i will need it during my university...

there are many thoughts that are running through my mind...

the insurance.... is not settled.

irritating i dont have enough money to spend. i need to save and save...

i lost my specs.... the specs which i love..

okayokay... God help me.

luckily i had someone to cheer me up! to come all the way from her house to meet me... thank God for her...

Parents

Who are parents? What is your father and mother to you?

What kind of parents do you want to be in the future?

Parents…
I only learnt to cherish my parents abit more when I started to enter the army…. When I realized they have been good to me. Our family did not have much money. So our house did not have a lot of nice items … most of the cabinets were brought over from the old home… So the interior design of the house was terrible. I remember when I was young… I always envied those people who were rich… aww they had a gameboy… oh they had a ps1… while I was stuck with a computer playing pokemon. Haha….

But now I finally notice.. that actually they have been trying to provide for our education and for our well-being. They probably are trying to save enough money to provide for their retirement too so that they will not depend on us so much… that is why our house is so old…. I mean… why wouldn’t my father spend more … to make his house look nicer.. I’m sure he would want that.. just that he can’t afford it.

I remember… this sentence… that struck me very deep. Do you treat your home like a hotel? I wish that there were more opportunities to spend more time with my family. Sometimes I think we grow up too fast.

Today I just heard of a crazy incident about a 21 years old guy who cant stand his mother…. His mother asked e maid to clean up his room cos it was very messy. And e ipod was missing…. They are from a rich family… so he called up his mom.. and talked as usual the mom nagged abit… and he threw his phone down and broke the phone…. He said “This is my room, I do what I like to my room.” Later on he broke a piece of plate… and told his mom I’ll break everything in the house… if you don’t stop talking. after talking to the mom again… and after that.. his dad talked to him.. he told his dad…. If you don’t stop talking… I’ll smash your car. Wth… what an ass. =/
Such utter disrespect for the mommy. IT isn’t his house omg. Its his parents house. He is feeding on his parents’ money and he takes things for granted. His phone, his ipod were all presents from his parents too.. and here he scold his mother for trying to do him a favour…

There are a few things I would like to comment on. In the bible… the one of the Ten Commandments is to honor your father and mother… it is a commandment… becos after all they are the ones that take care of us. As I see Khim taking care of her baby I realized how much work it is… to just take care of one small kid…. Khim also had to endure 9mths of “suffering”? Our parents love us just as God love us. However no one is perfect. They are after all humans. No matter whether they are right or wrong, good or bad parents… we are supposed to honor them… becos we are to learn submission to our leaders.

Furthermore, I cant imagine how the boy’s kids or wife would live in his house, Or how his kids will treat him when they grow up. I believe that if you have no respect for your parents… in the future your kids will also have no respect for you, because you will not be able to impart certain values that are crucial for your kids to grow well… and... you will not want next time your kids to be like you when you try to be helpful to them or you accidentally irritate them abit THEY scream and throw items at you... what kind of kids are they then?

Sometimes its not about being right all the time…. Many of a times… it is the relationship that you care about…. So you try to do all you can to patch it up.. Just a simple I’m sorry when you really mean it…. Will work. Not an msn I’m sorry larhs. Either a call. Or face to face would be better.

Learning to love your friends… and your sweetheart starts with the family, in which how you show your love towards your family will demonstrate how you will love your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse in the future… Therefore, contribute to the family. It isn’t a hotel, they aren’t your servants for goodness sake.

Love your parents and sisters, no matter what they do to you… your parents love you.. except for some exceptions lahs…

Make sure you teach your child well… I always wonder why curfews are said and computer time was banned… haha.. but now I know how important it is…

why am i earning money for?

it is painful and irritable. star trek was nice that was it.

anyway... just to update my checklist. i received my giro form... and sent it out to the bank.
I also changed my bank ... to signature instead of thumbprint. (: soo now i can sign stuff.. with my official signature.... okay. so now! i have officially 100 more smses! haha... i wish i signed up my plan a little later. so that i can get the student offer !!! grrr.. i want to "downgrade my plan" to the student plan! haha.. i hope i can!

i am.... going to be free really soon. i guess when you are free you start to think abit more...

you know... sometimes... life can be gone in just a flash... in an instant... BANG
you can just die.... and... no one will ever think about you anymore....
i want to be on the starship.... i dont want to get ejected out like jim...

peacee out

let time stop for a while

i'm starting to enjoy changii more and more! (: it really has alot of memories!

Planning for my future.

Ntu. you have inspired me. it is not about the distance i have to travel but about the quality of the school!



I shall start studying once again.

Physics. Attempt to try some physics questions again. I must get a few questions for myself to do.. or maybe ask czekin or others for some tutorials which i threw away! haha

Get ready for my ... university. getting my pencil boxes.

I also want to exercise!

basically do my basic exercises! pushups, situps and pullups. other stuff would include running and swimming.

I also want to go out with her.

rawr. so many places to go! so little time (:

can't we just be friends...
why do you have to do this to me...
why do I have to do that to you...

out of anger , love, frustration, rubbish. hatred... jealously...

can you hug me and tell me everything will be alright? can you hug me and tell me that its going to go away.....

Clearing up my to do list

1. Deactivate Starhub Voicemail [1]
2. Get the Giro Form and send it back to starhub [1]
2a. Go to DBS bank find out if my account is still thumbprint or signature. [o]
3. Get my stuff scanned at czekin place [1]
4. send esther & josh the ipod stuff [1]
5. Find out what is wrong with my psp [1]
5a. This is either the connection from the batt to the psp or the batt is not working at all.
6. Find a person with a psp and try to use his/her batt. [1]
7. Pay the starhub bill [1]
8. Meet esther. [o]

i cleared up almost everything..... everything went according to plan yesterday so i did accomplish alot of things..

Now this is the key question..... DO I, DO YOU like changes? hmmmm

irritation

i do not understand.... am i the 3rd party now?

i did not know esther well enough to like her until after the break up...

i did not purposely went to find her becos she just broke up.

sacrificial lovee ~

while they were away i cleaned the house and the toilets. I also packed the room. i felt so accomplished after that... but i realised how hard is it to really make your house clean... its such a chore yet a necessity.

im extremely exhausted. i stayed at Czekin's house till midnight waiting for Laraine to come back from Australia...

what did i get from her ? oh. you didn't pump full tank? well if you were more giving and generous with petrol and... didn't ask me always to pump what you use. I would have pump full... Yeps. its works both ways. Don't expect the little brother to do so much... when he isn't working... at least i got a thank you from her when i reached home. if not i would ... be pissed.



ohwell.. I loved one rochester. It was a beautiful place with awesome ambience... wonderful food. beautiful trees! bugs! I don't mind going back again.... the company was wonderful too.



Fireproof was a touching show... it made me realised a few things that i have been constantly neglecting.. it also reminded me about the difference in it.

1. loving unconditionally. well. i have always knew that i should do it. but... i always found it very hard to do... last mth i came to a realisation that our love must come from God becos our love is selfish. etc etc... This also means... loving her when you dont feel doing so anymore. Loving her still becos you are committed and you have promised to love her in good times and the bad and allowing God to help you to love.

2. I understood the fact that God is our creator we should therefore worship him.... becos he provides for our every needs.. the fan the food that we have are all from him... but there was something that i forgot... that was very important.... it was that Jesus died for my sins and that Jesus loved me with a unconditional love. All this was head knowledge to me. but now i am starting to understand a little bit more about unconditional love. About how can a man love someone who keeps rejecting him... time and time again... who can do that? only Jesus/God.

3. I realised i have been hurting too many people in the process... I should have known better. Now i feel guilty and... angry at the same time. Sometimes... i wonder what kind of man am i really am... maybe i dont even know the hidden agendas that i have...

I will make sure it will be the best... and the last... i do not want to hurt 1 more again..
There are many more stuff that i would like to share but my mind so tired haha....

anyway my feet is peeling horribly... i think i have to stop wearing slippers for a while.... I am gonna soak my slippers in dettol for 1 day. lol lets see... if it can kill the bacteria?!

It has been a wonderful 2 days. of just slacking and spending quality time.
I became to know alittle more and starting to love a little more... (:
Work has become a chore...

i realised work isn't fun at all. what work can ever be fun to me....
what can i do that i can enjoy. that i feel rewarded... and yet earn abit of money...





i made a promise.... and i will try not to break it....
hmm.


stop playing with people's emotions nathaniel.